Relationship

How S(He) Cheats on you with their Phone….

This is what cheating with your phone looks like. You know what they say, “if you have to sneak around to do it, then you have already started cheating”.

There are Stalkers in Nigeria – It is NOT a “White Man’s” thing!!

I just saw this girl on Twitter recount her horrors in the hands of a mentally ill person who stalked her through school and made her life miserable after he asked her out.

Read More…

Jennifer Aniston on Expectations from Women as Baby-Makers & Wife-Materials

Read More…

MUST READ! 10 Best Ways to Fall in Love and Stay in Love

10 Unspoken but very Important Reasons For Marriage Most Couples are Unaware of

Both husband and wives have their strengths and weaknesses. Rather than tear one another down, learn to work with them to build each other up!

10 Things that Happens When She Plays the Fool & Looks the Other Way

10 Dating/Marriage Myths to Throw In the Garbage ASAP

Are you in an Abusive Relationship? Take my Word for it; if he even Slaps you, Walk Away Please!!

Image from the web

Please, walk away! Do not think about where you can go to or how you will survive? If you never leave, you might not survive either. In other countries, the government has safety nets for women like you. It is a shame that Nigeria has not reached that level yet. 

One thing you should know is that it is not your fault that he is treating you that way. Forget every hurtful thing he has told you to erode your self-esteem and make you stay. A relationship is not supposed to be like what the lady above experienced. There are women whose husbands worship the grounds they walk on, truly love them and handle them like fragile eggs. May those men find you; Amen!!

Source: Break_or_makeup Facebook group

Since the Dead (Ronke Bewaji Shonde) cannot Speak, Alleged Wife-Killer, Lekan Finally Speaks from his Hide-out

Pictures sha… Does this not look like the typical picture from your Social media friends?
Who would have thought????
Lekan Shonde, the alleged wife killer spoke to PUNCH Metro about his involvement in this domestic violence case which has rocked almost all Nigerians to speak out against marital violence. 
Lekan and his wife Ronke Bewaji Shonde both lived in the Egbeda area of Lagos State and were married for 8 years. He told PUNCH Metro that his wife, Ronke provoked him by admitting to committing adultery with her lover in Abuja. Lekan is from Abeokuta (Ogun State) and is a depot worker in the Apapa area of Lagos State while his wife, worked with GTBank until she lost her job 3 years ago. They both lived in  lived in Tiemo Close, Off Awori Street, in the Egbeda-Idimu area.
Their union which Lekan said his mother was initially against is blessed with two children, aged six and four. Lekan told PUNCH that his wife, Ronke changed after she allegedly started dating the general manager of a publishing company

Q: What happened that night?

Lekan: It was around 9pm on Thursday. We had paid our nanny N20,000. Then we needed to pay our children’s teachers N30,000. I discovered she had taken N20,000 and when I asked her to return my money, she said she had spent it. I was angry because for the past three months, she didn’t allow me to have sex with her. I pushed her hand away from me on the staircase and I left her. She never tumbled or fell. In fact that night, I bought the food that we both ate because she said she didn’t want to cook.

I didn’t know anything had happened to her until Friday when I saw her on the staircase. I thought she was still pretending. I just left her and walked away.

Lekan: The last time I beat my wife was was three years ago after a disagreement. I never touched her afterwards. Since I married my wife eight years ago, she has never bought anything into the house. I gave her N5,000 on Saturdays and N3,000 on Tuesdays for soup. I also gave her money to make her hair.

She was working with GTB as a marketer, but she got sacked three years ago. For that period, I was the one feeding her and taking responsibility for everything in the family. I would wash her pants, bathe the children and buy foodstuffs in the house. She later got a job with a publishing company owned by her uncle. But my wife changed sometime in March, when she started dating the general manager of a publishing company. My wife was going to the office from Monday to Sunday and she wasn’t going to church again, all because of this man. She called him ‘Eyitemi’ (My own).
Last week Friday, she went to Abuja and came back on Monday. She never told me that the lover was there with her. I learnt later that the lover was there and they slept together in the same room for four days. When she came back, she didn’t know I was inside the house. She started talking with the man on the phone that she really had fun with him and I didn’t know how to make love. She again said her private parts were paining her.

Lekan said he confronted his late wife who confirmed that she was indeed cheating. 
Image from the 360nobs
Q: Did you kill your wife?
Lekan: I had no reason to kill my wife. I bought her two cars and always provided for her needs. Jide, her brother lived with me for three to four years. Ronke’s eldest sister, Bolatito, has lived with me too.

Although I am not a saint, I don’t drink, I don’t smoke. I am a responsible man. The problem with my wife was that she was temperamental. She shouted at me whenever she talked. I am a Lagos boy and I can be in this Lagos for the next 30 years and nobody would see me.


Q: Why did you shut the gate on your children with your dead wife?
Lekan:  I never did. It was my son that closed that gate.

Q: Why did you take her phone away?

Lekan: I did not take Ronke’s phone away. I left it on the bed.

Ronke’s family now has only 1 surviving member, Bolatito as her only brother had died the previous year.
Here is what various eyewitnesses (family members and friends) had to say about this case

Bolalito (Ronke’s sister): My mother just arrived from Ilorin and the family wants to devote time to attend to her; we don’t want to talk about the incident. I am not in the right frame of mind to talk.
But all I want to say is that her husband is somewhere out there and has been calling. The police should reach out to the telecommunications company to know where he is. He called me and he said he wanted to see me. He also said he wanted to see his children and I should tell him where they are because we might never see him again.

Ronke’s aunt (said Lekan has been threatening suicide: Mummy is very sad with this, but she has forgiven him and does not want him to commit suicide.

A family friend: He always beat her because of his belief that she was into an extra-marital affair. The beating reduced a bit when the wife of her late brother who was one month pregnant before his death, moved into the house with them. She stayed for about eight months. She was like her saviour.

The Sad Story Of Ronke Bewaji Shonde

The Convener of the Women Arise for Change Initiative, Mrs. Joe Odumakin: I am shattered and heart-broken. Their mother had been a widow since they were all little and she has lost two of three children in less than one year. And it is hard to believe that the killer husband has been chatting with people, asking to see his children and blatantly lying that he only slapped her. 

Neighbours must learn to intervene when they hear unusual noise. And women, who are in abusive relationships, must speak out before it is too late. Lekan should come out and submit himself so he could be tried in a court, where he will have the chance to prove his innocence.
“I didn’t know anything had happened to her until Friday when I saw her on the staircase. I thought she was still pretending. I just left her and walked away”, said Lekan

I do not know what to say about this but I will let you read and decide.. I also want to know why he did not show any surprise that his wife is dead. 
He should have been asked,
  1. How do you feel now that Ronke is dead?
  2. Who/What do you think killed Ronke?
  3. Who did you report Ronke’s cheating behaviours to?
  4. Why did you not divorce Ronke? You made it sound like a chore that you fed and provided for her even when she lost her job.
  5. Have you ever cheated on Ronke before?
  6. If an autopsy is carried out on your wife Ronke’s body, do you think the cause of her death would be natural?
Anyway, like I said, the dead does not speak. We can say all sorts about them when they are gone and cannot defend themselves. It is especially sad that this woman did not celebrate mother’s day yesterday.

And why does every husband in this situation threaten suicide (side eye to Teebillz)?

Source: PUNCH Metro

Image from the web

Video: Tiwa Savage, “For the Past 2 Months, TeeBillz & I have not been Together. I knew this Marriage wasn’t Going to Work”

Click to Watch the Video here via Pulse TV
My reaction now

If No One (Not even One Woman) will Objectively Discuss the Linda Ikeji/Wizkid Ordeal, I will!

Here’s the thing; You can insult me, insult my family, call me any names you like, even lie that I slept with your forefathers…but don’t threaten me. If you threaten me, I will act!                                          

You see, violence against women and threat of violence against women is not okay. Threatening harm to someone in a public space is a criminal act in every country of the world, including Nigeria. I bet some of you didn’t know that, yeah? You can not publicly threaten someone with harm. You will only get away with it if your victim doesn’t report to the authorities. If they do, you will have a case with the police and I promise you, the police take these things seriously. 

                                                                                 Nigerian Blogger, Linda Ikeji
These are excerpts from Linda Ikeji’s lengthy blog post yesterday on why she reported Wizkid to the Lagos State Commissioner of Police.
If you do not know how this story got to this point, I will share the bit that I know. It all started when Linda published a story which she claimed came from a reliable source alleging that Wizkid was served a quit notice at his Lekki home. Wizkid went on Linda’s instagram page to call her names and alleged that she slept with some director of his…which Linda has denied and also mocked Linda’s age, called her some derogatory names and defamed Linda’s pictures with derogatory memes.
Ok, here is my take on why I am writing this piece. In a bid to remain objective about my own blog content, I rarely visit Linda Ikeji’s blog. I have followed this story for quite a while now, not because I want to but because it is all over the place. I also try to avoid writing stories about Linda because I do not want to ride on anyone’s coattails to propel my website to the limelight. Some of us have integrity you know. However, after seeing the way she is portrayed by the media, I have to wear my cape and do what is right; which is not to defend Linda but to bring objectivity and open-mind to a story that is overrun with sentiments! 
Her accusers online claim that;
Image edited from the web
  • Linda does not like Wizkid (they claim that if she does not like you, she will “thrash-talk” you on her blog).
  • Linda commits intellectual fraud by stealing people’s materials for her blog without acknowledging them (This is wrong. I know that almost every Nigerian, students especially does not know that you cannot use any idea that is not yours without attaching where you got it from. I hope Linda learns this).
  • Linda has influenced a long line of terrible journalism (I think people need to realize that everyone is responsible for their actions. I cannot blame the pornography industry if I become a porn star today. I do not see anyone blaming the big tech companies for the knock-offs that China has saturated our markets with. People also are blind to see how this lady has risen to become the breadwinner for her family).
  • Linda lies about people to boost her blog traffic (I am a little bit on the fence about this. She does not hide the fact that she is a gossip blogger. She has made money off it. Some of the stories she posts will be ugly but true or maybe a little bit farfetched so I will leave you to judge that).
  • They claim that she tries to cover up her evil deeds by giving money to the less privileged and supporting people financially (Seriously, no good deed truly goes unpunished. You are damned if you do and damned if you do not!).
Linda’s defence
Image from the web
  • Linda claims to have promoted Wizkid since he broke out and she is all about publishing stories or gossips.
  • She claims to never post any unverified stories (whether they are ugly or beautiful).
  • She reported Wizkid because he threatened her life not because he was rude to her.
  • Linda said that in more civilized countries, Wizkid would have lost his endorsements and spent the next year or so apologizing and being in the fore-front of promoting anti-violence crusades against women (People were quick to claim that she wants/wishes Wizkid to lose his endorsements).
  • Linda said Wizkid wrote “RIP Linda” on his social media page and she noticed a few young girls write same and having fun with it (Now, this is what I think is sad. We do not even know where to draw the line between a real joke and verbal abuse).
  • Some fans online claim that people’s beef with Linda increased after she bought her mansion (I never say anything that I cannot back with a proof so I will let you run your mouth which you will do anyway, no matter what I tell you).
  • Linda claimed she reported this story to encourage other women not to accept threats to their lives and not to tolerate any kind of violence against them.
  • Oh and by the way, Linda is starting a vlog series soon and she is well #excited!
My Verdict
Image from the web

It hurts but Linda is a blogger and unless you are blind, she has the word “GOSSIP” boldly defining her blog contents. That is her job. She gossips and we all know that the gossip world is ugly. She is the number 1 blogger in Nigeria today and that means that she is probably doing something right (or do I say “doing something wrong right”). That means that people actually want to know what she has to say.

Now, I wonder why people still get shocked when she writes things that are not too kind about people. She is a gossip blogger, she does not exist to be nice. She cannot only write good news about people.

Linda has been on the warpath with celebrities everywhere since she started blogging but this is the first time she is involving the police. Remember when RMD called her “a nobody” because she published a story about his N250 million mansion? So it is funny that people (especially women) are laughing at the fact that she is trying to defend women’s rights. She has taken hits before and she is only involving the police now. I think she is onto something. And who are we to try and decide for her on why she reported this case to the police.

I always say the world has become funny. You do something and everyone has varied opinions on the reasons for your actions. I mean, it is something you did but someone thinks they know you better than you know yourself! It is no wonder we tell domestic violence and rape victims how they are supposed to feel. Over-sabi dey worry us so much that we thrust ourselves in people’s lives and exert our false opinions on their actions. Hian!!

Her accusers also cannot see 1 thing – that Linda who has an estimated net worth of about N3 billion has made her money from hard work. That is something we can at least celebrate; Hard Work!

Lessons for Linda Ikeji

  • I know Linda has a lot to learn from this as well especially properly retracting stories if presented with facts that her published blog posts are wrong.
  • I think she has also learned how to properly cite the sources for her blog stories (but people will never forgive her for her past especially because she has made a lot of money from it).
To the people on a crusade to crucify Linda
There are other crusades in the world that is dying for your attention;
  • Young girls sleeping with married men for money.
  • Corruption in Nigeria.
  • Free education, Power, great healthcare system, and Clean water for Nigerians. etc.
Also, you need to remove the log in your own eyes before you jump behind your various devices to pass judgement on Linda. Just because we sin differently does not give you the right to look down your noses on another human being.
One woman, came out saying Linda is not 35 years but 40 and that she has proof of this (which proof? Na you born Linda? Hian!) 
If you are a woman hating her, sit down and ask yourself why you really hate her. Is your hate personal or justified? If it is personal, I have 1 word for you; “Negodu”!!
This was the only thing I had this to say when this started,
It is a shame that in this 21st century in Nigeria, we cannot discuss a successful woman without bringing her down for her age or being single!
I have said my bit. Thanks for reading and please, feel free to share your thoughts!

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